Hello everyone, I am the ex-partner refered to in the post below (and numerous others):
Having since done couples dance, I did enjoy it very much and was very successful with my former partner (current BAC champs! 
) but would be very wary of skating with a partner again since my partner was extremely rude to me at the end, made irrational and untrue accusations and then refused to speak to me and was very aggressively rude when I tried to smooth things over and talk to him as I had no idea why he suddenly wasn't even speaking to me. I've still no idea what his problem was or is but am now very happily back doing solo dance.
I originally hoped that after she had let off some steam at the time, batikat would let things go, but as she's continuing to recount the same set of lies and misleading half-truths and as it has been pointed out to me that her signature makes it trivial for anyone to identify who we are, I have decided to post a brief version of events from my perspective.
As has already been stated, we made good progress in our competitions in 2009, with a very satisfying result at Oxford. I thought that we were then looking forward to our first IJS event at BAC and hoped to be able to take feedback from BAC to improve things and compete in Germany for the first time. Our coach was extremely supportive of this plan and had us working on new elements. I have a good friend in the US who is a Technical Specialist who was going to help us on the IJS side of things, so everything was looking great.
Unfortunately after Oxford we were not getting regular practice as a couple and it became rare to spend more time working on things out of a lesson than we were in our normal lessons.
By the time February came around, we had not made progress on any of the new elements our coach had been trying to get us to work on and indeed it was clear that almost nothing that we were doing was going to be good enough to be called under IJS. I became frustrated and just over a week before BAC expressed the desire to pull out as I didn't want to waste the vacation time, etc on what to me was going to be a wasted trip.
The discussion that followed (which is the first occasion of me being "very rude" to batikat) made it clear that we had different approaches to competition and preparation and that these approaches were not compatible. What I saw as a minimum amount of work from each of us outside of lessons was "taking the fun out of skating" and what she saw as a reasonable approach to training was far less than I was willing to do if I was going to enter a competition and present something to an audience and judges.
Our coach mediated and in the end we all agreed that I would stick with it for the BAC competition as we had already sent in the entry form and that the partnership would then end.
I then came down with a chest infection, which didn't help, but in any case we skated at Sheffield. As expected, we did not skate well, but due to the way they had split up the classes into lots of different age groups, we still ended up winning some medals.
I then had several weeks off the ice and multiple trips to the doctors before I recovered enough to return to a normal lesson schedule towards the end of March.
When I got back from Sheffield, I sent batikat an email congratulating her on her result in the free skating and to let her know that I wouldn't be in for a while due to the illness and that she should feel free to take whichever of our couples lessons she wanted and I would arrange new slots with our coach once I returned. I mentioned our earlier discussion with the coach in which we agreed that our differing approaches were not compatible.
When I returned, it was to discover that she had been spreading all sorts of malicious lies about me around the rink and on various internet fora and as a result I elected to stay out of the online and in person discussions.
Anything I said or did in the following months kept getting twisted and changed. Perhaps she thought that what she was saying to me to other people wouldn't make its way back to me, but whatever the reason, it was clear that I could not gain anything by engaging her and elected to stick to "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything".
The final incident refered to above (the "aggresively rude" bit) when she tried to "smooth things over" with me, was after she had spent a long period of time treating me in the same manner that she treats another adult skater at our rink with whom she has fallen out. She perhaps forgot telling me all about her scheme for how to talk to and behave around this skater to wind her up and so seemed surprised when I recognised that she was doing the same thing to me.
Anyway, I had been careful to stay away from her on the ice (whether she was in a lesson or not) and one morning she came up to me and refused to leave me alone. After clarifying that she seemed to believe everything that she had been saying about me (and therefore there was no point in me trying to argue with her), I asked her to leave me alone on several occasions and finally skated away from her, presumably in an "agressively rude" manner.
